Saturday, November 8, 2008

Reason #287 - Why we might be rednecks -

I'm trying so very hard to raise my boys to be gentlemen. It's not going so well.
My oldest will be turning 12 in less than 2 weeks. And since we'd rather not have to remortgage our home to cover any further baby sitter wages we've decided to start experimenting with leaving the kids at home for short periods of time.
"This is a test"
"I'm testing you"
"Don't abuse your power"
"Don't answer the door"
"Don't answer the phone (unless it's me)"
And most importantly....
"No fighting!"
I left the oldest with the youngest for approximately 30 minutes while I went to pick up Dreamy (the middle child).
I returned home to find the youngest crying.
Smurfette: "Hefty was being mean to me."
Hefty: "I was not being mean to her mom (he starts crying)....I was only trying to tell her the things she does that gets on our nerves....like whining and tattling and being bossy....but I was telling her nicely....and then I asked her what she wanted to do....do you want to play a game? Do you want to do a puzzle? And she was being a brat and she REJECTED me! (still crying) She rejected me so I told her that was the last time I would ever try to be nice to her. And now she's tattling on me again."
Me: "Can't we all just get along. Smurfette, if you want the boys to be nice to you....you need to start being a little nicer to them. Go give your brother a hug and show him how much you love him"
Smurfette: (still sobbing) No mom! (hiccup sob) I'm not hugging them any more! (hiccup sob) Cuz every time (hiccup sob) I give them a hug they TRY (hiccup sob) to squeeze out a fart!"
I tried to show dismay. I tried to bite my cheek and give my son "the look". But dude.....(insert southern drawl) I don't care who you are, that's there's funny right there...

15 comments:

Brooke said...

AWww brotherly and sisterly love!

Anonymous said...

Dude, seriously. THAT is funny.

Christy said...

Is this what I have to look forward to?

Kate said...

Oh my, is THAT what I have to look forward to?? Ack.

LittlePaintedPolkaDots said...

That is some funny stuff right there. If it makes ya feel any better... J does that to me all the time. I guess it NEVER ends *rolls eyes*!

Anonymous said...

Aw, that is adorable and sooo flippin funny.

Leslie said...

rofl... that is pretty funny! I can totally see my two doing something like this. As, right now, my son is farting and laughing his little 3 1/2 year old head off. Boys.... what can I say? It only tapers off a little when they turn 15. They want to appear cooler you see. But the 15 year olds still think farting is funny. ugh!

Suzie said...

I hate when people try to squeeze the farts out of me

Unknown said...

HAHAHAHAHA!!! What would we EVER do without siblings!!!

http://www.commonmom.com

Anonymous said...

That is sooooo funny. Manners are totally overrated.

Kori said...

SNORT. Perfect, hilarious, and true.

Colleen - Mommy Always Wins said...

Ha ha ha...

Now here's yer sign...

Angel The Alien said...

LOL.... yeah, sounds like our house! Monkeyboy watches Little Bear sometimes for short increments... but it often ends in disaster!!!

Happy2bme said...

So funny! Talk about some serious sibling love.

Breanne said...

That is too funny.