Tuesday, April 21, 2009

In a nut shell....

I'm in a hurry cuz I'm get'n ready for my girls 4 night / 5 day "Group Therapy" trip to a Florida beach resort. I'm tie'n one on as I type to cure my pre flight gitters. And I'm still not done pack'n. I've been a sucky blogger lately. I know. I'll try to be better....but no promises.

I have a new addiction. Facebook.

I've kinda started thinking of my bloggy and twitter friends as my "imaginary" friends....friends I've never met and in all likelihood never WILL meet.

Facebook? Takes up only a fraction of my time and keeps me connected to my IRL friends. So? The novelty may wear off eventually but for now I'll be an occasional blogger and try to keep up as best I can with my "imaginary" friends. =)

If you're on facebook...and you're reading this.... look me up!

I'll be back from my trip on Sunday and hope to have some pics to share of my therapy session! =)

Thursday, April 16, 2009

She died from "Fright"

I've been trying to spend some time with my Grandma to go through her old photos so I can get started on her heritage album. This is one of my favorite things to do. Learning about my heritage and preserving family members' legacies.

So, I was at her house yesterday afternoon and have to share this story with you. My Grandma is the funniest woman you all will never meet. She doesn't try to be. It's just natural.

In going through her old photos we came upon a photo of my Great Great Grandfather. My Grandmother's father's father. I started asking questions about her father's parents and here is what she told me:

G: Well, you know, he was raised by his father (in Italy) because his mother died when he was a baby.

Me: (writing all this information down in my notebook....fascinated) How did she die?

G: A milk snake.

Me: Huh?

G: Yeah, a milk snake scared her to death.

Me: Huh?

G: Well, you know, back then they didn't have finished floors...they were poor and slept on the dirt. She was nursing the baby on the ground and fell asleep. She woke up to a 'milk snake' drinking her milk and she died of fright.

Now, I obviously don't believe a word of this but she totally does. I was laughing hysterically while she told this story and she was just looking at me like "what the hell's so funny....it's a true story". So this will be the story that will go in the heritage album that will forever preserve this family's legacy.

Let it be known that my dear dear Great Great Grandmother died because a 'milk snake' latched on to her lactating tit and scared her to death....literally.....

This is why I'm trying to preserve this families legacy now....while I'm still alive....cuz there's no telling what kind of ridiculous stories will be passed down to my own family about my life...... or death.

Friday, April 3, 2009

Easter 2009

Easter's almost here and I've been hard at work with my annual Scavenger Hunt Madness poem. Bringing out my inner Edgar Allen Poe. And I think it's complete. I may tweak it here and there or add another verse or 2 but this is the semi final product. Thought I'd share it with ya'll again. For those of you that have stuck around this past year, you may remember last year's poem. I hope to get Easter morning on video and I'll share it with you. Assuming I can remember how to post a video!

I've returned to Smurfland
One of my favorite homes
To leave some Easter clues
For you little blue gnomes.

I watched with excitement
During Easter last year
As you found all the clues
With smiles and cheers.

I know how much you like
to run to and fro
looking for Easter eggs
both high and low.

But you know the rules
You must first hear my speech
About things I am proud of
And goals you must reach.

You should be very proud
Of the accomplishments you've made
Both at the gym with your skills
And your report card grades.

Your dedication and focus
And constant personal best
Really makes this rabbit
Rather impressed.

I've seen lots of improvement
In this past year
In the way you treat your sister
Your efforts are clear.

But please remember
To always be nice
Before you open your mouth
You must first think twice.

you're next
My sweet dimpled boy...
Your handsome smile
Brings me such joy.

I've been watching you at school
Working very hard
You deserve every "A"
On your report card.

But will you really force
Your mom to agree
To allowing a mohawk
If you don't get a "B".

I think that a head
With that spiky hair
Will only encourage
People to stare.

Your big wide smile
Is so very sweet
And watching you grow
Has been a huge treat.

This past year has flown by
With amazing speed
I mean...oh my gosh
You can already READ!

The one thing I love
Above all other things
Is your kindness to others..
It makes my heart sing.

Be sure to talk kindly
To your brothers too
Because I know you want them
To be kind to you.

All 3 of you smurfs
Fill my heart with pride
But you still have to work
To find where your baskets reside.

My clues have been too easy
these past few years
So I'm adding a little twist...
Open your ears.

I'll be smiling wide
Cause you may look like fools
Following the instructions
And all of my rules.

But remember I'm watching
And if you don't do as I say...
I may not return
For next years' Easter day.

Are you guys ready
To get this show on the road?
You'll find your first clue
Near the basement commode.

I stubbed my toe
When I left that last clue.
Please find me a band aide
To help heal my boo-boo?

Ah, Thank you!
I feel so much better!
Now walk on your hands
To where you'd send an email letter.

To find another clue
You could make a wish
Or simply tap dance to the cupboard
And grab a dish.

Now put on your shoes
We're going outside
You must walk backwards
To your daddy's new ride.

If your looking for your baskets
I might suggest
That you hop on one foot
To that birdies new nest.

Nope, not here
*giggles* this is so much fun
Now you must dance your way over
To the water guns.

I feel so cruel
For teasing you so...
All 3 of you must hold hands (& don't let go)
While you search behind a photo.

To find another clue
You won't have to go far
Just skip on over
To your tiki bar.

So, have you had enough
What do you think?
Maybe you should bunny hop
Your way to a sink.

Now go run 3 laps
Around your home
And don't you dare cheat
Or I'll ship your baskets to Rome!

After you've completed that task
Go talk to your mom
For she holds your next clue
Right in her palm.

Are you all out of breath?
Now touch your hands to your knees
And keep them just so
While you search under pine trees.

Remember I'm watching
I see all that you do
So cartwheel to the mailbox
To find your next clue.

Now you must twirl around
Like a ballerina in a costume
While you make your way over
To the basement storage room.

Now pat your head &
Rub your tummy
As you look in the freezer outside
For something yummy.

I really hate
For this fun to end
But I'm running out of rhymes
And I have more homes to attend.

For the grand finale
You must get down low
On your hands and knees
In a row.

Now all 3 of you smurfs
Must transform into toads
And leap over each other
To the room with the laundry loads.

Good-bye my little Smurfs
I look forward to next year
Prepare yourselves well
for the fun will be far more severe.