Our 24 hour date

Hubby and I had a 24 hour date starting Saturday morning. I honestly can't remember the last time Papa Smurf and I went out alone so this was a much needed date. Our date started at a charming outdoor mall. We spent lots of money enjoyed the atmosphere and a leisurely stroll through the weekend shopping crowds and my hubby was a pain in the ass complaining about the prices and SUCKING the fun and joy right out of shopping and reminded me why I HATE shopping with him was a trooper and bit his tongue several times (I'm pretty sure I saw blood at one point) as I tried on and purchased a FEW items. Have I mentioned how much I love my husband. He's a good man.

From there we headed to Applebee's for a casual dinner for two. Did I mention we were without children. Well, I think it deserves repeating. We were without children. I ordered my favorite....Shrimp and Spinach salad....and enjoyed uninterrupted conversation with my incredibly intelligent, funny, and witty husband....and I'm not just saying that because he let me spend a small fortune.

From there we stopped back at the house to let our poor dog out. The house was empty. It was mid-afternoon and the children were gone. Some events from the evening are not appropriate blog material....but let me say it again.....the children were gone......

We then headed to what we were hoping would be an obnoxiously fun evening at DTE to watch Kid Rock and Rev Run in concert.

Here's where I stop my story to tell you a little about myself....

When I was young(er)....lets say pre-children....I was a party lover. I was one of those girls who loved going to bars. I chose bars based on the crowd with a "the more the merrier" attitude. Shoulder to shoulder crowded dance bars were a plus. The louder the music and the louder I had to scream over the music the better. If the crowd consisted primarily of drunk & obnoxious patrons....I was happy....probably cuz I blended right in. I enjoyed the crowd, I enjoyed the dancing, I enjoyed the obnoxiousness, I enjoyed a good time. Every now and then I'd come across a fuddy duddy in the crowd who would thumb their nose at the obnoxiousness of the crowd and I would think to myself....and well, let's be honest here.....sometimes SAY to said fuddy duddy...."lighten up and have a little fun."

Things have changed.

I don't know WHEN....I don't know HOW...but they've changed....drastically.

We drove to the concert in the rain. The sky didn't offer much hope for the rain ending any time soon. We had lawn "seats." I've never had lawn "seats." But how bad could it be. We didn't think to grab umbrellas and my dear party animal concert going friend KELLY told us not to bother bringing chairs or blankets because it would be shoulder to shoulder standing room only. Did I mention we forgot umbrellas....did I mention it was pouring....did I mention we WERE ON A MUDDY SLIPPERY STEEP HILL OF A LAWN!

We arrived an hour early to stake our claim on a small portion of mud lawn. We had a good view. We also discovered on our way in a small booth selling plastic tarps, ponchos and umbrellas among other things. So all was not lost. We purchased a couple umbrellas and a plastic tarp to sit on and I was happy. This isn't so bad. As time progressed the crowd grew thicker and thicker. And drunker and drunker. And the ground became more and more slippery with each passing minute of rain.

Do you know what happens when drunk people try to climb very crowded and very steep and slippery slopes?

They fall on you....

They dump their beer in your lap....

They break your umbrella.....

They break your sandal.....did I mention these are my favorite pair of Crocs.....

They nearly break your foot when they land on it.

The six square foot area that we had claimed with our plastic tarp shrunk to five.....

four.....

.....three............TWO square feet......

Until It was literally shoulder to shoulder on the lawn. So Kelly you were right...I won't kick you in the shin after all. ;-)

Oh, but that's OK. I'll just have another beer. If you can't beat'm..... join'm. I got up to use the rest room and purchase a beer.....with my broken sandal and swollen foot. By the time I was ready to return to my "seat" .......with umbrella in one hand and a full beer in the other.....the crowd had thickened to cattle herd proportions. I had 27 beers dumped on me, poked 83 eyeballs out with my umbrella, was stepped on 566 times & elbowed 324 times, and got lost. I couldn't find my hubby among the 20,000 sardines. So I stood and sulked. And pouted. And drank. I couldn't even smoke a damn cigarette because my hubby had them with him. And even if I HAD a cigarette to smoke....I couldn't smoke it anyway because my hands were full with umbrella and beer. Yeah, I was happy. And by the time I finally found my husband....I had to pee again. All this and the concert hadn't even started yet. Are we having fun yet?

It was at this time that I came to a very disturbing realization. I have become that fuddy duddy. That crotchety old person. The party pooper. The priss. The stick-in-the-mud (pun intended).

And I'm OK with that.

With all that said Kid Rock put on an awesome show.

But I can now say with 150% certainty that I will NEVER get lawn "seats" again.