Tackle it Tuesday

I've seen in recent weeks bloggers doing purse posts. I've been meaning to get around to cleaning out my purse so I'm killing 2 birds with 1 stone. Today's Tackle is my purse...AKA...the black hole. Here it is...my FAVorite purse in the whole wide world....

And I'll bet you'd like to take a peak inside the black hole....

What was found in the black hole? A pile of lots and lots of receipts...(I like to shop)...

A pile of coupons (most of them expired)...

A pile of miscellaneous garbage....

The 10 lbs of change at the bottom of my purse....

Remember the Mega Millions ticket that I hadn't checked yet...I JUST checked the numbers this morning....I didn't win...but at least I was able to prolong the suspense and delay the disappointment for a few weeks...

My 2 "must haves"...my Palm organizer and my Tide to Go pen....AKA: the miracle pen

(EVERY mother should carry one)....

lip glosses, VS body spray, eye drops...

mints, gum, candy...

I really need a bigger purse!

My darling daughter says to me last night: "Mommy, I have a big surprise for you but you can't come in my room until I'm done" (Said in 5 y/o sing songy voice)

Me: "OOOO....I love surprises....I won't look. Just tell me when you're ready"

DD...10 minutes later: "K, mommy, I'm done. Close your eyes." She guides me to her room while my eyes are closed. "K, open 'em"

And this is what I found....

Spotless...all her dirty clothes in the laundry room, bed is made...and made nicely, the baby's crib that is usually over flowing with miscellaneous toys, books, and garbage is completely emptied out and dressers are clear of all clutter.

Me: "WOW! Smurfette, you did a fanTAStic job and I didn't even have to ask! Where did you put all the stuff that was in the crib and on the dressers?"

Smurfette: "On the table in the great room"....

LMAO! She's such a sweetheart!

7 MORE things....

OOO-OOO-OOO!!! I've been tagged!!!! My first tag EVER! This is so exciting! I'm such a dork....a bonafide loser......but I think a feel a tear drop forming....my first blog tag ever. I read blogs with tagged links on them and bloggers who consciously decide that they can't be bothered by participating in tagged Memes ...I read those blogs and think...man they are just too cool. -sniff sniff - some day...I want to be that cool. I want to be too cool to bother participating in a Meme....but I'm not...& I'm ok with that!

I've been tagged by Colleen at Mommy Always Wins to write a list of seven random things about me. The fact that I just posted my 100 random things about me post isn't gonna stop this dork from coming up with another 7!

The Rules:1. Link to your tagger and post these rules on your blog.

2. Share seven facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird.

3. Tag seven people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.

4. Let them know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog. So here it goes....

1) I was once hit on by Barry Sanders while I was in college (he was taking courses at the same college). I was working at Wendy's...I was working my magic on the salad bar and must have been looking particularly hot in my grease smeared apron...and smelling lovely of french fried pheromones. I had no clue who he was and kinda blew him off...I was working and my district manager was paying us a lovely visit...and quite frankly, Barry Sanders isn't the most attractive man in the world. The other guys that I worked with were spying on our conversation from behind the walls and when Barry Sanders left they all jumped down my throat to tell me who I was talking to. OOPS!

2) I'm not a big football fan. Obviously.

3) I worked at Wendy's for 6.....looooooong.........years........starting when I was 15 years old....before I finally got a job in a hospital during my 3rd year of college.

4) I still think they have the best chicken sandwiches and I still always order the same thing when we go there...... Chicken club with cheese, bacon, mayonnaise and mustard.... YUMMMMMMMMMMM.

5) I went to the tanning booth last week so I could get a base tan before going on my girls' weekend trip to Florida so I wont burn my first day there....I'm look'n a little pasty these days.....I ended up getting fried from the tanning booth. Totally defeated the purpose.

6) I graduated from college with a 3.4 GPA....it would have been a 3.7 if I could have eliminated my 1st year of classes from my GPA average. I liked to party. I had to get it out of my system.

7) I'm such a dork...My original post only had 6 things listed...apparently I can't count either...so, #7....hmmm....I used to wear a size 7 shoe but since having kids I now have a size 7 1/2 right foot and size 8 left foot (most of the tme...depends on the shoe).

K...that's that....Tag...you're it....

Amanda from Things That Make Me Go HMMMMMM
Kate from Life As I Live It
Heather from The Jerka Family
(Sorry I don't know your name) at Domestic Accident
Marni at Marni's Organized Mess
(Sorry I don't know your name) at Backpacking Dad
(Sorry I don't know your name) at Cabrelli's at Water's Edge

Now a brief update on this past weekend. The boys participated in the regionals meet held in Columbus, OH. It was by far the WORST and most poorly run meet we've ever attended. Bad....really bad....painful even.

Friday...we arrived at the hotel around 8:30pm and went almost immediately to bed. First of all, I think our days of cramming all 5 of us in 1 room are over. I think we'll be getting adjoining rooms from now on. Dreamy Smurf was coming down with a cold and when Dreamy has a cold no one sleeps. He has a compulsive sniffling problem that's enough to drive any sane mama Smurf crazy. None of us slept well.

Saturday....we checked in at 8am. Competition started at 9. Hefty Smurf hit 4 of his 6 events but had 2 major falls on Pommel and P Bars which pretty much ruined his chances for placing in the all-around. We found out after the meet that he actually placed 25th (out of 34) in the region...5 states. I was proud of the way he handled it. He's matured a lot in the last year. Once upon a time he would have cried and sulked over those missed routines but he held his head high this time. He's just happy it's over now. The meet ran 2 hours late BTW.

Sunday. Poor Dreamy Smurf. He was so sick. He didn't sleep. Couldn't breathe. Throat hurt. Sounded awful. He was the afternoon session and check in was at 1pm....the meet didn't start until 3:30....logistics problems we were told. The parents were on the verge of starting a riot in the stands...chanting and stomping their feet and screaming "WE WANT OUR MONEY BACK". THEN, they (the powers that be) decided they wanted to try to make the meet go quicker by making 2 floor exercise areas...so that 2 kids could compete on the floor at the same time. They did this by taking the regular floor area and making two long strips. So instead of doing their floor routines on an entire floor, like they had always done, they now had to do the routine an a very long and narrow (MAYBE 4 feet wide) runway. You don't have to be a gymnastics expert to see how that would screw these poor kids up. It was awful. He did NOT have a good meet. He ended up with his lowest all-around score of the season. He just wasn't on his game. At one point the coach said he was feeling so awful that he wasn't sure he would be able to finish. It was ugly. We skipped the awards all together because it was running so behind that if we had stayed we wouldn't have gotten home until well after midnight and poor Papa smurf had a 6am flight to Mexico this morning. He left our house at 3:30 this morning. We still don't know how Dreamy Smurf placed. I'm just happy he was able to complete it and now it's over. Hallelujah!

Road trip to regionals....YEAY!

All right my dear bloggy friends, I'm taking a few days off from this wonderful bloggy world to take my boys to their final gymnastics meet of the season! Regionals! Wish them luck! The season is almost officially over! Can I get an "AAAMMMMEEEEENNNNN!"

There are few things in life that bring me greater joy than watching my awesome boys competing in this wonderful sport and watching all their hard work being rewarded....if not with the bling of metals and trophies than with the knowledge that they gave it their best shot. BUT! Every year at this time of year I am ever so grateful to have the season come to an end! All this travelling just inevitably burns my ass out! Even the boys have said that they can't wait till this is over so they can start working on new skills....as the entire 5 months of meet season are completely consumed with mastering and perfecting their current level skills. The post meet season is always a fun and exciting time for them in practice.

So I have a hefty "to-do" list to prepare for our last road trip. I won't be able to read or comment on anyone's blogs for the next few days. I'll be back on Monday to get updated. I'll miss you! I think I'll go through blog withdrawal....I already feel a headache coming on....uh-oh...and here come the hives...and geez my ass is tingling....oh wait...that's probably just the blood circulation returning......Yeah, this blog hiatus is probably a good thing.....

One last Smurfette conversation before I go:

Smurfette: "Mommy I changed my mind...when I grow up I don't want to be Hannah Montana anymore...when I grow up I want to be God. I'll make my own world where cats can drive cars and kids can fly like birds."

Me: "Way to shoot for stars baby!"

I figured she'd learn eventually that God's position is already taken with little to no chance of early retirement...so why crush her dreams now!

BTW - Slept a little better last night...that second glass of wine went a long way. God Bless Two Buck Chuck!

oooohhhhhmmmmmmmmm......

Did anyone happen to watch this last night? The Last Lecture: A love story for your life. This man, Randy Pausch, and his wife Ray are true inspirations. If you haven't seen it you should. It'll make you question the way you live your life. You can read the entire lecture here.

Completely changing the subject:

When I was younger and dancing in recitals I would start having recurring nightmares 2-3 weeks before the shows every single year. The dreams were always the same and were always one of the following...

1. Falling off the stage

2. walking out on stage during the wrong dance and having to fake my way through the dance. I would always wake up and think to my self..."why the hell didn't you just run off the stage dummy!

3. Forgetting costumes and dance shoes and having to run back home for them and ending up missing the show entirely because I was late getting back with missing items.

The reason I tell you that is to tell you this.....I've been having a hard time sleeping the last few nights. I go to bed anxious and nervous and my mind is just rattling with all the thoughts and things to do lists. I couldn't explain the feeling of unease...I was actually thinking to myself last night that it's time to start learning to meditate...I have GOT to learn how to empty my brain at night.

Anyway, I figured out the source of the nervousness this morning. I noticed last night that I have less than 2 weeks left before my girls trip. This is our 4th annual girls trip and every year about this time I start having nightmares about traveling. 90% of the time when I'm traveling I'm with my husband and family, and Papa Smurf always drives and takes care of the luggage check-in and tickets and such. I can't explain why but I'm always a nervous wreck about traveling without him. And it makes no sense because I'm not travelling alone. My friends and I are all on the same flight and we're all driving to the airport together. I'm a very independent woman. But for some reason travelling without my family turns me into a freak.

So last night I had one of THOSE dreams.

I drove to the airport and realized I didn't have my drivers licence. They wouldn't give me a ticket without it. My friends were urging me to run back home and get it because I had plenty of time....2 hours.....I live 45 minutes from the airport....on a good day....that's an hour and a half both ways.... So of course, I try to rush home but there's construction and traffic and I get lost. I get back to the airport 5 minutes late and the plane has already taken off and there are no more flights out for the next 4 days.

I really need meditation in my life.

The day is good if the sun is shinning!

Ever notice how much better a day can be when the sun is shining! I didn't even mind being cooped up in the house all day yesterday doing laundry. It was a very good day.

Dropped Smurfette off at school and spent an hour on the elliptical while she was there. After picking her back up we spent the day tag teaming some chores. She was quite the helper yesterday...enthusiastic even! I know these days won't last but she was happy to be "mommy's helper" yesterday. Did 55 loads of laundry...yes, I'm exaggerating! I wasn't planning on getting any of my spring cleaning projects done yesterday but I did manage to take 2 of my kitchen window treatments down to clean them...still have the third to do. They were BAD!

The boys came home from school with PERFECT report cards! Hefty got all A's and improved his citizenship scores! YEAY! Dreamy came home with all A's and a B+. And also improved his citizenship! YEAY! I'm just so proud of my kids. They work so hard. They each spend 16 hours per week at gymnastics(their choice BTW so please don't send me mail telling me how that's "too much"...believe me...I've already heard it ALL). And yet they still bring home these unbelievable report cards.

And I'm happy as a clam because that B+ means no faux-hawk for at least another year. YEAY! I can't remember if I posted about this or not but 2 hair cuts ago Dreamy insisted on getting a faux-hawk. I've finally learned what a faux-hawk is. When I drop Smurfette off at school I see all the kids (Dreamy included) coming from the lunch room and there must at least 10 kids in the 3rd grade with these faux-hawks...it's just a mohawk with the sides not completely shaved off....but close. I said "NO" when he asked...I don't know why...I just did...I'm afraid that a mohawk is just the beginning of a rebellion or something. He'll get a mohawk and then want a tattoo...or maybe even turn into a stoner...or start talking all teenage slang-ish....then wont care about his grades anymore and start saying..."YO! What up dawg!"...I know I'm resisting this whole independent thinking....I know I have to let go at some point but I don't think I'm ready yet. Then I was feeling all guilty for being like this over controlling mother who won't give her kids an inch to be free-thinking....so....I added a little incentive. I told Dreamy that if he came home with straight As for an entire year (that's 4 consecutive card markings) that I'd let him get a faux-hawk....and I'd let him keep it for as long as he continued getting the straight As...but the first B he gets the Fawk goes(I like that...my own word creation...get it....faux-Hawk....fawk....LOL...I crack myself up). It has kinda turned into a big joke now because I'm so happy to see a "B"....I make a big deal out of shaking with worry and a huge sigh of relief when I see that B....WHEW!!!

Anyhoo...then took the kids to gymnastics...Smurfette also had her gymnastics class....then took Smurfette to dance class....picked the boys up from gymnastics and came home...busy busy day.

Man...spell check is NOT liking me today!

Tackle it Tuesday!

So, after careful deliberation and much sorrow I made the conscious decision this morning to NOT participate in Tackle it Tuesday. This decision was made after tripping over the mountain of laundry that was piled up in my laundry room. I thought there was no way I could get to a Tackle it Tuesday spring cleaning project as my day was to be consumed by dirty underwear! But you know what?...I've changed my mind.....I'm making my mountain of laundry my "tackle"! Wish me luck! If you don't hear from me in the next 24 hours it's because my washer exploded...call 911.

I'm I the only "normal" and psychologically stable person in this world!?

Seriously, show of hands, I NEED to know that there are other psychologically stable people in this world!!!

So I'm about to tell you what happened to me Saturday afternoon...but before I do I have to explain something...I honestly don't know why I feel the need to explain this but that's the neurotic side of me showing through...maybe I'm not so "stable" after all....

anyhoo...my explanation....

I usually start my post the day before I post it. I actually started the draft of my 100 things about me post back on Friday morning...and was planning to post it on Saturday but it was taking WAAAAAYYYY too long! I can't remember exactly how far I got into it but I CAN tell you that I had made it past the part when I confessed to slamming on my brakes to get people off the ass of my car by the time the following incident occurred on Saturday afternoon. WHEW that was a long sentence...

So here's what happened. I'm on my way to the park to meet my 3 other friends for our 6 mile run. I'm on the freeway jamming to a little of Eminem's "Shake That Ass" trying to be all cool in my minivan...oblivious to how oxymoron-ish that is....I'm going about 70...the speed limit is 70...if you read Sunday's post you know that I don't usually go the speed limit....UNLESS....there is someone in front of me. And there was...a big black truck. I was in the left lane....I'm a patient driver...no big deal. I couldn't go around him because there was a car in the right lane blocking the way but I wasn't in a hurry, so whatever. I happen to glance in my rear view mirror and there is some jack ass in a white jalopy riding my ass...I'm talking he couldn't have been more than 2 feet from my fender. I'm thinking...MAN, wasn't I JUST blogging about this!!! But literally...there was no where to go...I couldn't get around the guy in front of me because, like I said, there was a car next to him in the right lane...and I'll be damned if I'm gonna just move over so this bully can just barrel his way down the highway....not gonna do it! So...I slammed tapped on my breaks....

This LUNATIC then does the typical "fit of fury drive by" only instead of PASSING me on the right he drives directly beside my car (on the passenger side) and is literally like 12 inches from the side of my car!!! Did I mention I was on the Freeway....and did I mention we were going SEVENTY MILES/HOUR!!!!! He rode like that for over a mile!!!!!!! He was so damn close to my car that if I rolled my passenger window down I could have just leaned over a little and picked that nasty little nose that he was flaring at me....he was cussing at me through the windows with wild arm and finger gestures and facial distortions that I've never quite seen before..... and his face was turning a scary shade of crimson that I've also never quite seen before. So for the first several seconds I did my typical passive aggressive smile and wave....trying to act all cool, calm, and collected but in reality my heart was - a - thump'n when I realized that this guy was OUT.OF.CONTROL! He ended up finally getting off on the exit that I was suppose to get off on but he was blocking me the entire way so I couldn't get off.....and so I ended up having to go two miles out of my way to turn around at the next exit.

You ~ crazy ~ fucking ~ lunatic!!! What makes a person THAT crazy? Seriously!?

So the moral of this story is...I'm changing my ways...this world is just too unstable for my passive aggressive tendencies...I just may end up getting myself shot by some road raged lunatic next time. All these years I've always thought I was teaching these people a lesson in patience when all I'm REALLY doing is giving them an excuse to shoot my ass.

So that was Saturday.... ps...if you're interested in reading about my training for the marathon you can do so by reading my other marathon training blog.

SUNDAY! Holy Moly it doesn't get any better than Sunday. 60 degrees, the sun was shining, not a cloud in the sky, my niece and nephew were over playing with Smurfette (they had spent the night Saturday night...and, yes, we had a little discussion on the proper disposal of pull ups) and we all spent the ENTIRE day outside. We went for a walk, we raked the lawn, we washed the windows, we fertilized the lawn, we did some spring trimming of the landscaping, and some much needed yard sprucing up. The boys had spent the night Saturday night at their friend's house. FAN-TASTIC day!


Around noon the kids were wanting a snack...so I said "why don't you guys all go grab one of the protein bars in the pantry"....they all walk back outside 5 minutes later and Smurfette says to me:

"we decided to have a fiber bar instead....

cause these fiber bars make you fart....

and I really want to fart....."

I take back #94 from yesterday's "100 things about me" post....I stand corrected!


Fast Forward a couple hours.....

The 3 kids were playing and finding a family of "caterpillars"...I didn't have the heart to tell them that those white "caterpillars" were actually the same nasty grubs that were destroying our lawn last year. In case you don't know what a grub looks like....they look like giant maggots....as seen below....








But, whatever, they're kids, they were having fun in their imaginative way collecting a mommy maggot caterpillar and a daddy maggot caterpillar and 3 little baby maggots caterpillars. They all lived in a cozy little house on a little island and lived in happy maggot caterpillar land.



I was trying hard not to freak out while my husband was giving them a lesson on survival and telling them that if they were stranded in the wilderness they could eat them for protein.....omg.....


They were at this for over two hours...the search for the maggots, and then the home set up for the maggots, and then the pretend play with the maggots.... why do I bother buying them toys?


and then they all just disappeared....


they must have gone inside....


So I went in the house to make sure they had listened to Papa Smurf when he told them to be sure to take their shoes off....they were tracking dirt all over the house earlier. I find them in the great room and inspect their feet....yep...they listened....good kids....I go back in the kitchen for a drink of water and hear the following...

5 year old Nephew - "yeah, we'll just say they moved and we'll build them a new house ......and....here, we can put this around them so they don't run away"....

I slowly and ever so calmly walk into the great room to find that these children had moved this family of 5 grubs ON ~ MY ~ COUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

K....all together now....one, two, three,......."EEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!"


I wont bore you with the details of the following 10 minute "freak - out" session that occurred....


PS - KATE - The Kate that keeps leaving me wonderful bloggy love comments....I need a link to your blog...it's not listed on your profile and I have no idea how to get to it!