Showing posts with label Pee soaked pull ups. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Pee soaked pull ups. Show all posts

Friday, April 4, 2008

The Tale of Two Ho-Bags

So Smurfette's getting ready for bed last night and the following conversation takes place:

Smurfette: "Mommy, it smells really bad in my room....it smells like ink right next to my baby's crib."

Me: "INK!?" (I'm thinking, how the hell does she even know what ink smells like?)

Smurfette: "Yeah, and now my blanky's gonna smell like ink"

Me: "Let's go sniff....(we go to her room together) "hmmmm, yuck! It kinda smells like pee-pee"...."I hope Gracie didn't pee on your carpet"....I walk around feeling for a wet spot on her carpet....I then get down on all fours sniffing the carpet....can't tell where the odor is coming from.....

Smurfette: "maybe it's C's diaper"

Me: "Huh? What do you mean C's diaper....where?"

Smurfette: "Right there!" and she points to a nasty, pee soaked pull-up sitting in her baby's crib.

C is my niece....she spent the night over 10 days ago......!!!!!!!!!!!!



Hubby went to the Tigers' opening day Monday. He went with a few colleagues and they were in a suite. So he tells me the following story....

We were all (a bunch of business men in their suits) standing around mingling and talking amongst ourselves when out of no where two ho-bags stumble in the door (K...those weren't his exact words...I'm paraphrasing here). Actually, I think he used the term "suite groupies". Suite groupies???!!! Seriously??!!

The ho-bags suite groupies stumbled through the door and said "ummm....mignd ifwe useurbafroom?"

business men: "ummm...no?"

The ho bags suite groupies disappeared into the bathroom. They stumble out 15 minutes later with cigarette in hand very obviously high as a kite...on God knows what. "ummmm....gan we shmoke in ere?" stumble stumble....

business men: "ummmm....no?"

ho-bags suite groupies: "oh...gan we shmoke out dare?" stumble stumble

business men: "ummmm.....no?"

ho-bags suite groupies: "oh....well...anyovyuuu whanna go ou dare an shmoke an makeout" stumble stumble...

business men: "ummmm...no? I think we're good."




There's no moral to this story...just thought it was funny.